This Guy Is Starting At Linebacker

According to this article (at the bottom), Eddie Moore is running with the first team at strong side linebacker right now. I have no idea who or what Eddie Moore is, and that's a bad thing coming from someone who obsesses over sports because he has no semblance of a social life. So being the intrepid reporter I am, I decided to go all Jimmy Olsen and dig up the hot shit on Eddie Moore.

According to Google Image Search, Eddie Moore was formerly a groundskeeper at Isothermal Community College in North Carolina. Isothermal Community College's motto is "Improve Life Through Learning." Considering he's old and bald and works as a janitor, he seems pretty happy, and he's obviously well prepared with that pen in his pocket.

According to Wikipedia, Eddie Moore was a 2nd round draft pick in 2005 who has 35 total career tackles, once had a trade vetoed for failing a physical and didn't play at all last year. I guess that's why he picked up the janitorial job. Either way, I couldn't be more excited by the addition of Eddie Moore to Denver's starting lineup. Wait, not excited- appalled.

So here's my not at all early wish list for the 2007 draft at strong side linebacker:

• Brian Cushing, USC
• Shawn Crable, Michigan

Done.