It's not even my birthday

So Deadspin, via some other website (and probably a bunch of others, because that's the way the internet works), posted Adam Jones's appeal, which is based on the fact that "everyone else was jumping off the bridge." There are a lot of people I don't care about, but here are your Denver Bronco All Stars:

• Rod Smith (wait, what? Rod Smith?) on 1/24/00, 3rd Degree Assault, for "allegedly choking and hitting the mother of his two children"
• Bill Romanowski (okay, that makes more sense) on 8/9/00, "Indicted on four charges of fraudulently obtaining prescription diet drugs."
• Brian Griese (ha!) on 10/28/00, DUI
• Dwayne Carswell on 3/2/01, Domestic Violence
• Eddie Kennison on 9/2/01, assault on a bouncer outside a nightclub
• Travis Henry on 10/26/01, "pleaded guilty... to a misdemeanor charge of attempted sexual misconduct for trying to have sexual contact with a 15 year old girl... after the girl told him she was almost eighteen." (yowza!)
• Gerard Warren on 11/20/01, carrying an unlicensed firearm
• David Terrell on 6/13/02, beating up a parking valet
• John Mobley, 12/28/02, DUI
• Dwayne Carswell (yay! our first double up!) on 7/4/03, Domestic Violence
• David Terrell (again) on 7/16/04, reckless driving, suspended license, no insurance
• Todd Sauerbrun on 12/15/04, DUI with a revoked license
• Willie Middlebrooks on 1/1/05, Domestic Violence
• David Terrell (jeez) on 1/21/05, for appearing late to court on traffic charges (okay, that's not a big deal)
• DJ Williams on 9/23/05, DUI
• Brandon Marshall on 3/26/07, Domestic Violence

Obviously not all of those guys were on the team when they got arrested, and not all of them are on the team presently, but that's still a pretty good list of transgressions. Among some other notables on the list are Darrell Russell getting arrested for slipping a mickey to a chick and then raping her, Darrell Russell getting arrested while leavig a brothel. Needless to say, Darrell Russell was really fucking ugly, because no one wanted to screw his rich and famous ass. speaking of birthdays, a fun little game for me is to try to find someone arrested on your birthday. Terrell Suggs, Lionel Gates- I see you!