Examining the Schedule: Week Eight

Mon Oct.29 vs. Green Bay

That's a picture of Mike Holmgren's first coaching staff in Green Bay, from 1992. Jesus Christ are those guys white. Even the black guys are white. If you look really hard, you can pick out Dick Jauron, Jon Gruden, Steve Mariucci, Andy Reid, and Ray Rhodes. If you don't look hard at all, you can pick out the ugliest fucking outfits this side of Utah. Even the Amish are begging for a little pizazz. And where was Mrs. Holmgren when Mike came home and announced his decision to dress up all his milquetoast buddies in khaki and yellow? Ugh.

Of course, that has nothing to do with the Packers, since none of those guys are there any more. You know who is? Brett Favre. I know you might not have heard of him, but he's a pretty big deal in Green Bay. Maybe you've seen his commercials, during which he complains about being old and dumps out big buckets of crawfish. No? Well maybe you've seen one of his passes. They're the ones cradled in the arms of opposing cornerbacks as they run back past Mr. Favre toward the opposing end zone.

On defense, they've got 2nd year linebacker AJ Hawk, whom you will never convince me is not Evan Stone:

Perhaps you know Evan Stone from his groundbreaking film work in movies like Bikini Cavegirl, Bikini Girls from the Lost Planet, or The Art Of Ass 5.

...um, me neither. At any rate, there's absolutely nothing else good about this team. Bubba Franks used to piss me off when he would beat my fantasy teams up by catching 3 passes for 12 yards and 3 touchdowns, but not any more. Now they've got one wide receiver, no running back, and a guy who used to be Kabeer Gbaja- Something. They also have a kicker of some sort. Probably.